peel him off the cieling

Gas can cause a variety of reactions.  The reaction typically depends on 1) whose gas is it   2) who is within 10 ft of the emission  3) how audible is it  4) how long does the blowhorn sound off.  and 5) is there enough left in the tank for an encore.

Have you ever experienced the ‘cubicle fart’, preferably your own.  That one turns from a relief to embarrassment and nervousness when someone walks up to talk about something. 

As a manager, I’ve unfortunately been exposed to the ‘performance assessment’ fart, the ‘interview’fart, and the ‘just stopping by to chat (and fart)’ fart.  In every case, my reaction has been the same – keep a straight face, maintain eye contact, and pray that the scent is passive, and doesn’t linger long.

I contrast that to the reaction to my 2yr old, who I could sell at a novelty store as a fart machine.  Obama should be looking to him and his peers for alternative energy.  The best is when they squeak out while he’s sound asleep.  His favorite time to let loose is when his diaper is being changed.  We laugh, and then he laughs, and then he does it again.  This routine continues until his tank is empty.  He puts his hands in the air, and says “all gone”.

Another classic is the ‘urinal’ fart.  The sound of the constant stream is paused for a brief moment while being interupted by a noise from behind.  I was in the bathroom at a movie theater, and I heard a noise.  I felt compelled to respond with a word of encouragement.  So a simple “Nice One.” came out of my mouth.  The individual responded with a hesitant word of gratitude “Thanks”.  I’ll admit that this was a not a shining moment in my life.  Neither was the time that I let out a “WOW” in response to an out of control machine gun blast coming from the stall next to me.  But it happens. 

My mom used to be very against audible gas.  If it ever happened in her presence she would have a look of disdain on her face.  One night during a family game of Phase 10 all that changed.  I am proud to receive the credit for changing her outlook on the whole thing.  A noise came out of me, and my mom’s countenance immediately went to a place of disdain.  However, when the noise continued for the next 15 seconds (most likely a personal record – take some time to count to 15, and you will agree that this was a phenomenal accomplishment) my mom couldn’t help but begin to laugh.  Everyone else laughed as well.  Then my brothers attempted to outdo my life changing fart.  They were unsuccessful, but they did have some ‘nice ones’.  From that day forward, audible farting has been an acceptable practice in our home.   

Gas can cause a variety of reactions.  Try it and see for yourself.

of coffee, God, and us

On Worship (creative arts insert for Meadowland Community Church annual meeting)

Three women sat in a coffee house wondering what to drink.  You may find that odd considering where they were.  One woman shared your sentiments, but she was alone in her simplicity of thought.  Her closest friend, sitting on her right, was used to gourmet lattes, toppings, and condiments all mixed up just right.  Her friends would attest that without that special brew she would be an unbearable wretch.  Of course they all laugh about it as they secretly pity her husband who is the unwitting victim of her wretchedness.  Across the table was a woman she had known for several years, but never really taken the time to really get to know her.  She found her to be a bit of an annoyance as she was so undecisive.  She was the one who would always make the waiter come back 5 times, and on the 5^th time would volunteer to go last because ‘she would probably know by then’.  Sitting in this coffee house was no different.  Somehow she would make picking coffee a stressful chore.  She, on the other hand knew exactly what she wanted, coffee.  She walked up to the counter, and said “just give me coffee”.  Confused, the barista began to question her decision.  He said, hang on I’ll have to make some.  We don’t get many orders for just coffee.  He walked to the back counter past all of the fancy dispensers and crèmes and began to brew the coffee.  When he had finished, he poured it in a cup, and served her.  She sat in the booth, warmed her hands on the outside of the cup, and allowed the warmth and the aroma of ‘coffee’ to envelope her senses.  She was pleased.

We serve this body of believers by leading the way into the throne room of God’s presence every Sunday morning.  We aren’t a group of highly skilled musicians who are committed to pleasing those we are leading.  We are a group of broken men and women who have come together, made whole through the saving grace of our Savior, unified through His Spirit, who long to worship and declare His worth.  God is pleased with the hearts of His worshippers (all of us).  He just wants some coffee.  Keep it simple and pure, and lay it before His feet in service to your King.

There have been several opportunities this year for us to look at one another and scratch our heads in confusion.  It is undeniable that God has been at work in our leadership, in our ministry teams, and in each one of us.  He has been molding and shaping our hearts to serve and please Him and Him alone.  He longs for our pure dependence and leaning on His strong arms. 

Will you ‘go limp’ in the arms of your Savior year?  Will you embrace the pain and hurt that is brought on by your needs, your failures, your inadequacies, and failed expectations?  When we embrace our brokenness, and see ourselves for who we are – fragile people; we will feel and experience the embrace of Christ.  We will respond by lifting up His name, worshipping Him in joyful praise for all that He is.  We will communicate to a hurting and broken world, the worth and splendor that is our Savior.  He will be pleased.

May you join us in this journey of seeking God’s face and dependence on His grace.

John Barnett and Meadowland’s team of worship leaders